Lament of the Mind

I’m falling back into one of my pits again. Everything that happens around me is upsetting me in some way, and I’m getting more upset because I don’t want to be bothered by it. There’s no reason, NONE, that I should be bothered by things that aren’t happening in my life. But then again, nothing at all is happening in my life, so…

I feel like the solution is to make things happen, but unfortunately that takes resources. Human resources, monetary resources, skill resources…I don’t really have any of those. I feel most days like it’s my will against an avalanche of shit that says “nope, you can’t do that, you’re staying where you are and not doing anything”. And, sadly, my will is weak and broken into tiny little pieces.

I think I’m gonna go cry some more now.