Lament of the Mind

I sit at night and talk to myself a lot. Dead-air tweets. Conversations about things that only I care about. Talking to myself about stuff I can’t talk to anyone else about.

I think, honestly, it’s the only way I’ve stayed sane. As insane as it sounds. I have to get these ideas out, these words out of my head and into the universe. I want so much to have an audience, even just a single person to talk to. But, I don’t. So I speak to myself. My genius, laid bare for all of…well, me, to see.

I know it’s not healthy. And believe me, I don’t want to. But the alternative, is…what, exactly? Sit and keep it all in? Because I can’t do that.

I need a companion in my life to take the burden of my own mind off me for a while. At very least, someone to converse with me. Someone for me to teach. Someone who can be my partner in things. Someone who can bring me out of my own psychosis when it’s at its worst.

Hope in one hand and shit in the other, I guess.