Lament of the Mind

femme-nymphet:

I think one of the worst forms of child abuse is injecting them with a terminal sense of guilt. parents who constantly use guilt as a disciplinary tactic end up raising children who are unable and afraid to stand up for themselves. they are taught that their needs are unimportant, that they’re selfish for trying to individuate, and that they don’t really matter. they essentially begin to look at themselves as a burden, as something to be tolerated instead of loved - how cruel is it to make a person feel apologetic for their own existence?

the worst part is that since the abuse isn’t “actively” vicious, it’s difficult to identify it. when a person is raised on guilt, they have difficulty establishing boundaries, and they have difficulty developing themselves spiritually. as such, they’re more likely to become victims of further abuse in their adulthood. when something bad happens to them, they assume they deserved it.

it’s the people who apologize for everything, it’s the people who deprive themselves of things that are good for them, it’s the people who end up isolating themselves from others because they feel inherently damaged.

guilt is a poison and the only antidote is compassion